Playgirl Movies Fail The Assignment

This month’s Women’s Health magazine features an article about “Igniting sleepy sex drives.”

An engaged couple of thirty-somethings are given an assignment to check out some porn and see if they can put some zing into late night sex.


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Following the recommendations of a female friend who enjoys porn, Stacey brought home three movies. At 10 P.M. she popped Playgirl’s Burning Lust into the DVD player, and before long she and Bryce were both laughing and rolling their eyes. “We weren’t into the beefcake/Barbie-doll sex,” Bryce says. “It was weird to see so many fake boobs and unnatural bodies.” The next night, a second title, Playgirl’s Erotic Encounters, got an equally bad review. “We fast-forwarded right through it,” Stacey admits. “The sexual acrobatics were awkward.”

The third flick, Xana and Dax by Comstock Films, was different. “This was our favorite,” Bryce says. “There was no plot; it’s a real couple having sex. They looked like people we would know and be attracted to.” Stacey agrees. “I loved Xana and Dax because they’re a real couple, with genuine orgasms and a sincere admiration for each other,” she says. “We watched it straight through, and even though we were as tired as usual, we had sex right after.”

Naturally my friend Tony Comstock is over the moon about this glowing recommendation, and good for him too.

I’m also nodding my head with regards to what this couple thought about the Playgirl movies. I must admit to feeling distinctly underwhelmed after seeing Erotic Encounters.

4 Replies to “Playgirl Movies Fail The Assignment”

  1. The moon and beyond!

    Hunter, of our title DAMON AND HUNTER, was on a Playgirl shoot recently and had this to say:

    We shot in this huge loft in the West Village. Everything was painted white and the ceilings were really high. There was the usual strewing of odd set accesories around, a large glass vase filled with conch shells, some sort of Roman bust statue, silk roses, white shabby chic slip covers. I have no idea why but I always pay attention to that sort of thing. Whose room is this supposed to be anyway?

    Funny, those are the sort of things I notice too, especially the “Whose room is this supposed to be anyway?” part. When porn’s gotten to the point that I, a suburban, lawn mowing, deck staining straight man am noticing the decore and not the lovely woman with her legs akimbo, something’s gone terribly wrong!

  2. Ah Tony, you have “wallpaper syndrome.” It’s a disease I just made up, but it’s something a lot of long-time adult webmasters tend to do, including myself. Looking at hardcore sex has become so routine you end up more interested in the hideous green wallpaper in the background.

  3. I don’t think the problem is that looking at hardcore sex becomes routine. There is no reason that watching sex should be any more boring than watching fishing or home improvement, both of which have very watchable TV shows devoted to them.

    I think the problem is that the hardcore sex is produced in a way that makes it terribly boring to watch, which leaves you with nothing to do but start scaning the frame and noticing how misguided the rest of the production is.

  4. interesting

    i’m not into porn per se and it’s always been because of the fake people having fake orgasms with fake soundtracks.

    that they always look like they got lost in some bad 70s era idea of sexy interior design only makes it worse.

    regardless, my search for my sex drive has led me to reading sex blogs and now i’ve started writing my own smut. *that* works better than ANYthing ever has.

    i finish a post and i’m so randy i could fuck … i can’t think of anything gross enough i would willingly bang… regardless, once i finished a post and masturbated in an elevator directly after because i couldn’t WAIT.

    this is a big change for no libido girl.

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