Confession time.
When I was 12, I was completely in love with George Michael. I had 50 posters of Wham! on my bedroom wall, a well-worn copy of Make It Big on the turntable, a growing scrapbook collection of magazine articles and a desperate urge for a T-shirt that said “Go-Go” or “Choose Life” (sadly, I never got the opportunity to own one – damn my parents and their lack of interest in expensive, fad-inspired clothing).
I knew that the best line in Do They Know It’s Christmas was “But say a prayer, pray for the other one,” because George sang it.
I was horribly jealous of that chick who flies off in the seaplane in the Careless Whisper video, even though I couldn’t work out why she wasn’t forgiving him immediately and going back to his bedroom for another shag.
Oh, and I knew that stupid Barry Manilow was just being a big 70s knob when he said that Last Christmas was just a rip-off of I Can’t Smile Without You. I mean, couldn’t he see the words were like, completely different?
Advertisement
Support independent, ethically made, award-winning porn. Bright Desire features all of my erotic films and writing. A membership to Bright Desire gets you access to every movie I've ever made and lets me keep making female friendly porn!
Click here to find out more.
-------------------------------------------------------
George was, quite simply, the best looking man in the whole world, and I wanted to marry him, soonest. At the same time, I was embarrassed to publicly admit to being a Wham! fan. I mean, even saying the word makes you sound kinda stupid.
Time passed and I moved on. I decided that George was a little too obsessed with sex for my liking; I wanted a Mills and Boon pretty boy, not a leather-clad perv who sang about doing it.
I decided that Mel Gibson was the best looking man in the whole world and, mid 1985, did a major poster swap and learned every line in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. George became my ex, a secret, shameful passion that I could not admit in polite company.
And it’s been that way for many years. When conversations come up about the 80s and other women confess to Simon Le Bon fetishes, I’m still hesitant to come out about my Wham! period.
And it doesn’t help that George Michael is gay. Oh sure, he looked like he was interested in girls back then, but it was all a lie, a sham, goddammit! He was leading me on, the bastard, we were never going to get married! Never!
So the other day I found a DVD of Wham! videos in the bargain box and, on a whim (or should that be whim!), I bought it.
Alone at home with the DVD player and a bottle of chardonnay, I indulged myself in a trip down memory lane. There was George in flouro shorts with possible shuttlecock, asking me to cuddle up baby, move in tight… And there was that heart-wrenching Last Christmas video with lots of sad, meaningful looks across the room. Oh, how I had wanted to go to a lush snowy chalet at Christmas with George and laughingly decorate the tree with tinsel while wearing a thick, high necked cardigan.
I found myself singing along, admiring George’s soaring voice. And thinking that yes, he really was very good looking back then. I’ve always had a thing for stubble and beards.
The other thing that struck me was that many of Wham!s songs were not very romantic at all. Indeed, the vast majority of them involved infidelity, bad relationships, difficult women, or women who just wanted money. Otherwise their songs were just about having sex. All of them were written by George Michael.*
Big hint there.
The songs were OK, if not great. I realised that, essentially, Wham! were just a boy band that existed for impressionable 12 year olds, and they didn’t really mean anything much. And after watching the DVD and getting out the old LPs, I felt a little less embarrassed about my past.
So now there’s news that George Michael is making a comeback, launching a new album and tour. He did his first live performance in 15 years in Barcelona.
My main thought on this is: George… what the hell happened to your face?
Yup, he’s been under the knife and it makes him look awful. I suspect he’s always wearing those sunglasses to hide the horror eye job.
Beyond that… well, I don’t care too much. My musical tastes are very different now, and besides, I got married. To a wonderful man. With stubble.
*Actually, not all of them. Stupidly enough, Careless Whisper, which George performed as a solo artist, was the only song co-written by Andrew Ridgeley (also known as “that other bloke in Wham!”).
George Michael was a hottie, alright! I think the Faith, I Want Your Sex album was his BEST work of all time, ever! He looked SO adorable in those tight shorts. He had those huge eyes, lips I could feel all over my body, and I bet he trembles like a snake in bed. He’s kissable. I haven’t noticed any plastic surgery. I probably haven’t been paying attention.
I don’t see where the plastic surgery comes in. I do believe, however, that very very early in his career with WHAM! — like, before they hit it big — George Michael had very subtle, good plastic surgery on his nose. As for his eyes, he’s doing what BONO does — covering them up with cool sunglasses to hide the inevitable wrinkles and creases. Am I alone in this assessment or did GM actually have plastic surgery on his eyes … because I’m just not seeing it.
I’m no expert in plastic surgery, but it’s got to be the reason why his eyes look so different. It’s not just wrinkles, the shape of his face has changed.
This page has comparative photos. Something doesn’t look right.
Now… Yogchick, you have an interesting site 🙂 George Michael-based slash erotica is a rare niche.
Thanks for spreading the word to http://www.quirkysex.com
Your synopsis of your George Michael Experience over the years was a pleasure to read. As a writer for Rolling Stone once said: Everybody has a guilty pleasure — why not make WHAM! yours?